Books and Fart-Nuggets
You can thank the lovely Anna Meade (@ruanna3) for the latter bit of this blog’s title. 🙂
First of all, gentle viewers, check this out:
No, I did not just grab a ream of paper and plunk a title page on it. I promise I didn’t even think of doing that. (Dammit.)
Anyway, that’s the book. All 606 pages of it. That’s some pages. 121,926 words. A bunch of chapters. All of them numbered wrong — thanks to my failure to see what the compile function in Scrivener would do with my manuscript. Good show, Emmie.
It’s okay. Keep your handkerchiefs in your pockets.
I’m not sending this bad boy to any agents yet. Instead, I am going to hole punch the fart-nuggets out of it and stick it in the biggest binder I can find. Then I’m going to find a red pen.
I said it.
I went through this evening and took a good hard look at the first few chapters. I changed some stuff around, and I will probably change more. One bit of sobering advice I’ve heard a lot of lately is that if the first two chapters aren’t among the best in your book, you should probably start the book later.
I think a lot of writers get caught up in setting the scene for their novels, but as Ms. Kristen Lamb said in her recent blog post (oddly referencing Star Wars as well) about the phrase in media res, starting your book by explaining everything is kind of why the Star Wars prequel trilogy bombed like an imploding Death Star. We just plain didn’t need to see it all played out. We knew Anakin would end up Vader. We knew Yoda was always awesome. We really didn’t need any of that reiterated — and I think we all know we didn’t need to meet Jar-Jar…ever.
This isn’t to say that my first chapters suck — just that they were written some time ago, and they need a little sprucing up. My style’s evolved a bit, and I feel more concrete in who my characters are now, which makes it easier to write them.
So here I go, diving in with my red pen. I just wish I had a Darth Vader costume about now.
*A note on fart-nuggets, since I’m sure some of you don’t want to be uncouth enough to ask. As I explained to Ms. Anna, that’s simply my PC way of saying shit. Which I’ve now ruined, because now I’ve gone and said shit. Twice.
“Good lord,” some of you are no doubt thinking. “If that’s her PC way of saying it, she must be very uncouth indeed!”
You’re quite right, gentle viewers. I was raised by a mom who cursed like a sailor even when I charged her money for it. I know much of what I do from baiting her into expletive-fests by turning the TV to any channel that showed Rush Limbaugh. I have long since come to terms with that moral gray area.
Love and kisses!
- Star Wars Planet Named After Jon Stewart of the Day (geeks.thedailywh.at)
- The Darth Vader Burger Becomes A Reality, Lucky French Bastards (thecrimsoncrow.com)
Posted on January 13, 2012, in writing process, writing progress and tagged Darth Vader, emmie mears, George Lucas, Science fiction, Star Wars, Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, Television, urban fantasy, Xbox, Yoda. Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.